Saturday, September 19, 2009

Why My Job Title Should be "Whack-A-Mole"

So, like many Americans out there, I'm in middle management. More specifically, I'm an IT Manager. Basically, I get to do all the random crap that most others won't do, or don't have the will power to do.

Everyday, I get phone calls and e-mails from co-workers about "this doesn't work," or "that doesn't work," or the ever happy conversation that ensues after, "I think it died..."

I've adopted a philosophy that I like to call, PICNIC (Problem in Chair, not in computer). Whenever someone at work asks me how my day is going, I happily respond, "oh, I'm going to a picnic," while on my way to "fix," an e-mail setting (this typically gets some kind of response like, "oh really? when?" or just confusion, which I just enjoy). Operator error is the #1 issue of computer problems, yet never gets reported that way. Go figure. Nobody can admit that they're morons when it comes to certain things. I'll gladly admit that I'm a moron when it comes to things like automotive repair, plumbing, and skilled things involving fire like welding (though I do enjoy blazing a nice big fire in the backyard with a little too much gasoline poured on, and making fireballs with WD-40). Why is it that nobody can admit that they're a moron with a computer? It's not for everyone, I understand that, but don't tell me the computer died just because you can't connect to a particular website.

At any rate, I suppose I should get back to the point of this post instead of ranting about computers and idiots killing them. My job is that of a glorified whack-a-mole. I think I'll get my boss a mallet for his next birthday just to make it official.

While all of this other stuff is going on when I have to save every department of the company from computer issues, I also get to do other random projects that have absolutely nothing to do with my job. For example, when have you seen an IT person do things such as accounting, fulfill management roles for sales, marketing, and then random carpentry projects? Mind you, this is no small company where there's the owner and just a handful of employees. I know for a fact (because of one of my random, non job related projects) that there are about 450 employees working for this company.

So back to the whack-a-mole... I feel this way mostly because, on a daily basis, I get the proverbial smack on the head, while being told, "I need you to do this..." as if I didn't already have enough going on. I typically don't bitch and moan about things like this, except that I recently found out that a known lazy bastard in the company makes more than twice as much as I do. There goes the mallet on top of my head again.

Everyone, the owner included, recognizes me as one of the hardest working individuals in the company, and that the place would probably fall apart, or blow up in a riot if I were to leave, yet I'm grossly underpaid. I wish I could have more faith in the job market, but double digit unemployment rates don't make that route look too promising.

So I'm back to peeking out of the hole and checking to see if I'll get smacked down again. I'm just having another picnic at work.